I hate being alone at night time.

My mind won’t stop and my body won’t sleep. The endless thoughts keep me awake.

People are distracting. People are bandaids. People are like painkillers. A temporary solution for a problem that I don’t know how to resolve any other way.

this does not make sense
it’s all so incomplete
it’s all so incomplete

I forgot to say goodbye
I forgot to read the signs

it’s all so personal
and confusing

it’s all so personal
and confusing

questions|answers.

Read more »

i have so many good people in my life, and i am so unbelievably grateful to have each and every one of them.

i’m seeing Aoife in less than an hour.
this makes me all kinds of happy, you’ve no idea.

just did the whole ‘how on earth did i get home and into bed last night’ thing.
oh man.

you have too much power over me, and i think that i’ve come to hate it more than i ever loved it.

people are not designed to be understood.

good day yesterday.
good night last night.
good morning this morning.
good day today.
good night tonight? hopefully.

i don’t at all believe in destiny or fate. i don’t believe that our lives are pre-programmed to lead to a specific point.
i believe that whatever happens, happens and whatever doesn’t happen, doesn’t happen. everything that takes you to a different place or position is nothing more than a coincidence.
one of many.
life is just a series of coincidences. two or more things coming together at the same time, purely by luck, yielding a certain result. a result that is then subject to countless other coincidences, varying and changing the circumstances and manner of the resultant outcome.

i like to think that everything in life is a matter of chance, luck, and timing. everything will always be unpredictable and nothing will ever be definite or unchanging. there are so few things in the course of our lives that aren’t prone to adjustment and variation.

i like to think that every single moment is capable of making or breaking your life. spending a few more seconds drinking coffee before leaving your house could mean that you narrowly miss finding yourself in the middle of a fatal car collision on the way to work. being a few seconds behind can save your life. similarly, those few seconds could instead cause you to miss a bus, where you might have sat next to a stranger who could have struck up conversation with you- eventually leading to this person becoming your lover or good friend.
i don’t believe that anything is predetermined. it’s all a matter of coincidence; timing. sometimes we’re lucky and sometimes we’re not.